Good morning,
"How do I get past mistakes?"may be the #1 question I get asked by athletes who are frustrated and upset. In my first article below, I give you a very straightforward and practical way to respond to them in four easy steps.
Then I challenge you to examine how intentional you are in your practice and training. We don't get better just by putting in the time. The quality of time matters. I think you'll enjoy this one.
Best,
Dr E
P.S. - You might be aware I am a HUGE Buffalo Bills fan ... we have a big game against the KC Chiefs on Sunday night. Winner goes to the AFC Championship game. Send us good vibes!
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A Solution to Your Mistakes
Does making a mistake knock you off your game?
Do you get frustrated and then have the mistakes pile up, one after the other?
Are you afraid to make a mistake? Fearful that if you do, you won’t be able to reset and the whole game will be lost?
I have a technique for you. A specific four-step strategy to follow after mistakes that will bring you back into the present moment, ready to play your best.
It’s called “The 4 F’s”
- Fudge! … No, do not emotionally eat and have a snack. Allow yourself 1-2 seconds to have a negative emotional reaction. We all hate mistakes, they hurt the team, and we get frustrated. So let the frustration out with an internal yell of “Fudge!” (or whatever you have to say) to express yourself. Then, when game play allows, move to …
- Fix … This mistake should teach you something. The real mistake is to let this learning opportunity go. What could you have done differently to get the outcome you wanted? Did you need better focus or more effort? Is there a technical correction to make in your form? Was it a strategic or tactical error you can approach differently next time? Find the answer and imagine yourself doing it successfully. If possible, move while you imagine the right form and positive result (such as taking another golf swing with the correction made). Then …
- Forget (or “forgeddaboudit” if your from New York City like me) ... This mistake has no more value for you. It offers you nothing but a distraction and emotional distress. You have learned from it, now it is time to …
- Focus … on the next play and what you need to do right now, in this moment.
🥇Check out “The Psychology of Performance: How to Be Your Best in Life” at www.thegreatcourses.com/dreddieoconnor in both audiobook and video formats for lessons on focus, confidence, overcoming anxiety and perfectionism and more.
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What Are You Training For?
Yes to get better and improve, but ultimately what is the purpose of your training?
I believe it is to be your best when it matters most. Either in the biggest moments, or the most stressful. To maintain your consistent best and not see a performance decline when under pressure.
Training is about preparing for adversity. What is it that messes up your performance most? Does your training address this? It should!
Understand that everything you say, do and think matters. Everything you don’t say, do and think matters. You are either moving toward your goals or away There is nothing that doesn’t count.
So are you being intentional and deliberate in your thinking and behaviors? Ate they moving you toward or away from your goals? Are they enabling you to better handles stress and anxiety, or are they contributing to it?
For example, how is your sleep? Every night you have an opportunity to improve mental and physical health with 8 hours or more. If you are getting less, you are missing an opportunity to get better at best, hurting yourself at worst.
Are you training your ability to handle stress and manage anxiety? If not, why should you expect to perform well under pressure if you haven’t trained for it?
Be intentional about your training.
🥇I’d love to support you inside Success Stories Membership, an online community of high-achievers like you working to get better everyday. Check us out at: https://dreddieoconnor.com/membership.
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Dr. Eddie O’Connor
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