Most people treat networking like speed dating.
They show up in a DM.
Ask a few questions.
Say thank you.
And then vanish.
Two weeks later, they come back with a “Hey, just following up…” message that feels… off.
Here’s what I teach my clients instead:
Don’t collect contacts. Build advocates.
Because advocates:
→ Remember you
→ Root for you
→ Refer you—even when you’re not asking
But you can’t build that by being transactional.
You build that by showing up differently.
Here’s how:
1. End the first convo with a soft anchor.
Something like:
“Thanks again for sharing your story—I’d love to stay in touch as I work through this job search. Hope it’s okay if I reach out again down the road.”
You’re not forcing a mentorship. You’re planting a seed.
2. Send a meaningful follow-up later.
Not “checking in.”
But value in return.
Examples:
→ “You mentioned a challenge with onboarding. I came across this post and thought of your team.”
→ “I revisited my case study after our chat—especially the part about business impact. Here’s how I reframed it.”
Even a one-line update that shows reflection makes you memorable.
3. Give before you ask. Always.
Tag them on something relevant.
Celebrate a launch or milestone.
Share something useful without expecting anything back.
Over time, they’ll associate you with:
→ Thoughtfulness
→ Consistency
→ Growth
And when a referral or opportunity pops up?
You won’t need to “ask.”
They’ll already think of you.
Because you didn’t just show up once and disappear.
You built a relationship.
So the next time you have a great coffee chat or LinkedIn convo—don’t let it end there.
Ask yourself:
“What would this look like if I were building trust for the long term?”
Then act like it.
Joseph
0 comments